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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27718804">coda</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverinerivers/pseuds/silverinerivers'>silverinerivers</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>No. 6 (Anime &amp; Manga), No. 6 - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Domestic, Drinking, First Time, Fluff, Introspection, Letters, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Post-Canon, Relationship Study, Reunions, Switching, Yuletide</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:21:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,140</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27718804</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverinerivers/pseuds/silverinerivers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Shion remembers how it wasn’t until the sensation of Nezumi’s lips on his own faded and the image of Nezumi’s back blended into the skyline that he realized what that meant.</p><p>Reunion will come, yes, but on whose terms?</p><p>(The answer? Nezumi's - at first. But Shion ensures that they explore the rest of their firsts together.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Nezumi/Shion (No. 6)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>82</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Yuletide 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>coda</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Findarato/gifts">Findarato</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I couldn’t pick between your amazing prompts, so I tried to work in a bit from each. I hope you like it &amp; happy Yuletide!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Shion doesn’t hear a word from Nezumi for over a year.</p><p>It’s not the first time that they’ve spent so long apart, Shion notes, except the circumstances are vastly different.</p><p>Back when they were children, Nezumi leapt into his life like a phantom, a shadow born from the storm, leaving a wreckage in its wake. Up until that point, Shion’s life had been meticulous, not a speck out of place. For him, seeing it all uprooted in ruin had uncovered tucked away cobwebs, raised questions he’d never think to ask to the surface. Above all, Shion remembers the tornado that had whirled into his room, stolen his breath, life, and loyalty. Back then, he never thought that Nezumi would come back to him, that Nezumi would have watched out for him from yet another place Shion was never privy to.</p><p>However, this time around, Nezumi means much more to him now, and they’ve gone through much more than just one night’s worth of healing and fascination, as strong as their initial connection was.</p><p>This time around, Nezumi leaves with a declaration, affection hidden in the words he won’t say out loud.</p><p>This time around, Nezumi has promised to return.</p><p>Yet, once again, Shion was the one left stranded. Wondering. Hoping.</p><p>There was certainly a part of him that wanted to follow, that knew he wouldn’t be dead weight anymore, that the destination can be a question mark this time because it isn’t about where they end up so much as who they’re with.</p><p>But this wasn’t his journey. He was entrusted with something much more difficult, to repair what once was sinister and patch it up with trust.</p><p>They were brought together by the city, and it was what caused their lives to diverge again, a breaking point Shion promised to mend, to make No. 6 brand new.</p><p>So, on that note, they parted.</p><p> </p><p>Shion remembers how it wasn’t until the sensation of Nezumi’s lips on his own faded and the image of Nezumi’s back blended into the skyline that he realized what that meant.</p><p>Reunion will come, yes, but on whose terms?</p><p>Damn it Nezumi, Shion curses quietly to himself, and gets back to work.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Being the one standing static with no idea where Nezumi is, it of course leaves Nezumi to make the first move. In the meantime, Shion sees the streets of No. 6 cleaned up, the government exposed and rebuilt, buries the radio silence by burning the midnight oil and replaying what he remembers most vividly. The shape of Nezumi’s easygoing smirk, the fluidity of his movements not in a fight but in a dance, the warmth of Nezumi’s palm in his, the two of them only human in an ever-changing world.</p><p>  </p><p>The first letter comes delivered by a rat.</p><p> </p><p>Of course.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Shion,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Is the sky clear where you are? It’s thunder storming out as I write this, and it reminded me of you, the night we met. After a few months out here stuck in dry season, to be frank with you, it definitely came as kind of a welcomed change, a spark of life in the midst of a drought. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I heard about the latest election. Congratulations. I expected a bit more of a fuss, but you did well. I wonder if I would recognize the place if I came back now, how much it would change a year from now, how much you’d change it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Maybe it won’t be recognizable anymore, and that’s quite a thought isn’t it? </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>I should’ve written you sooner. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Nezumi.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Shion looks down at the letter and laughs quietly to himself. The rat stares back at him expectantly.</p><p>Nezumi did not write that he wanted one back, but clearly he does. Not that he would have just left it without a response. It may not have been the most loving letter in the world after a year of nothing, but it was Nezumi’s handwriting, his truth scrawled along the page.</p><p>So, Shion gets to writing.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear Nezumi,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It stormed a couple of days ago and I think of our first meeting every time it does. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’ve tried to remake No. 6 so that you wouldn’t recognize it. I’d change its name for you if I could, if that’s what it takes.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And yes, you should have. When are you going to come back? Where are you? You can’t just disappear for a year and say so little. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Give me a bit more. Please.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Shion.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The next letter comes in a month.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Shion,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I know you would, but that’s not why I’m not back yet. Just wait, I promise you it’ll be worth it. You’ll wait, won’t you? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sometimes I wonder where I am too, sorry I don’t exactly have a mailing address and that these responses take time. Don’t worry, I haven’t gone off and disappeared off into the mist somewhere or fallen off a cliff. That’s more something you might do, or have you gotten more coordinated since we last saw each other? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Yesterday, I almost named a new rat. Keyword being almost. Thought that’d give you a laugh.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Nezumi.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Shion does laugh at that.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear Nezumi,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Cryptic responses for a cryptic guy. You’re a wandering nomad who doesn’t know where you are, but I suppose I should feel flattered that you still promise to find your way back to me. You better.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I have gotten more coordinated! Maybe not so much in dancing. There was an occasion last week where I had to lead, and I have to admit it was a lot easier when all I had to do was follow you.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Makes me almost wish that I followed you instead, but I don’t regret staying. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Would you have named him Shion? </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Shion</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>They trade letters back and forth after that. The frequency isn’t terrific by Shion’s standards, but rats need time to travel too, don’t they? He gets little hints of where Nezumi is, luscious forests and abandoned cities, trekking through wastelands to get to small bustling towns. Shion reads about the various gigs Nezumi gets as a guest actor and how it feels to be able to live as someone else at every new place he stops. Nezumi’s versatile, masks stacked on masks with always more on hand, but Shion holds onto the knowledge that Nezumi is the most real when they’re together.</p><p>In turn, Shion tells him about his reconstruction efforts, how his mom’s bakery business is booming, so much so that they had to move to another part of the city so she could accommodate the demand. He asks where Nezumi is every couple of letters, knowing full well he won’t get the kind of response he longs for. Instead, he gets letters littered with jabs to poetry to talk of the utter mundane.</p><p>Shion treasures each and every one.</p><p>
  
</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Then one day, he doesn’t get a letter back for three whole months, the longest stretch since the initial gap of communication. Shion’s pushing twenty-two now but his heart is still stuck on sixteen, yearning for a still image of a boy who he promised to wait for. But teenagers aren’t patient, and Shion’s running low on serotonin, continuously perusing Nezumi’s side of their exchanges for a pick-me up.</p><p>Then on the first day of the fourth month, Nezumi shows up at his doorstep.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He looks like hell, midnight blue hair tied up but gathered messily like a crow’s nest in disarray, dirt smeared across his nose bridge and along his chin. He’s sporting a new jacket in his old style. It’s been worn out, the sleeves tattered and a few buttons noticeably missing. His pants are in a similar state, his knees exposed by rips in the fabric, splotches and stains that won’t come out.</p><p>Shion opens the door to Nezumi leaning halfway against the door frame as if he’s the one who’s been waiting for Shion all this time, boasting a tired but mischievous curl of his lips when their eyes meet.</p><p>“You look like hell.” Shion cuts to the chase, blinking up at him. He fights the urge to poke at Nezumi just to ensure he’s really here. His heart pounds wildly at this grown up version of Nezumi, how while his dreamed up images of Nezumi were pretty close to how he looks now, sharper jaw and longer limbs, they still don’t come close to the real thing.</p><p>“So, are you going to let me in so I can fix myself up or what?” Nezumi asks.</p><p>His eyes are ashy gray under the sunlight, a spark of whimsy and familiarity settling right into the space Shion has set aside for him all these years.</p><p>“You’re a couple of years too late for that.” Shion mutters, but he can’t help but smile at Nezumi when he steps aside to invite the other man in.</p><p>There’s an awkward moment of silence after Shion shuts the door. He’s thought about this moment for a long time, but now that it’s here, he’s not sure what he was really expecting. All the movies he’s watched optedfor some big emotional reunion with orchestral flares of a symphony in the background, which couldn’t happen here. It’s too late for him to rush into Nezumi’s arms, for Nezumi to pick him up and spin him around, planting a kiss to seal the deal.</p><p>God, Shion still can’t forget that kiss.</p><p>“I never promised a specific date Shion.” Nezumi starts to say.</p><p>Shion knows that, he does. He opens his mouth to say so just as Nezumi continues on, his tone faintly somber.</p><p>“But I shouldn’t have taken so long.”</p><p>Same as the letters, not quite an apology, but Shion hears it for what it is.</p><p>“Better make it up to me then.” Shion says, smiling, and starts to move on.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Turns out there’s a lot left to say when the only thing they’ve delivered to each other for half a decade were short scribbles carriable by rat.</p><p>It’s easy and it’s not.</p><p>While Shion relishes in hearing about all the good and bad things Nezumi’s been up to, he feels his heart lurch at the nature of it, little things where he can’t help but visualize himself being there too, picking out apples at a market or trekking through forests knee-deep in mud. His stories pale in comparison, how he’s fallen into more of a figurehead than someone who jumps in and <em>does things.</em></p><p>“So, you’re saying you’re bored.” Nezumi snaps him out of it.</p><p>Oh, he said that out loud, didn’t he.</p><p>“Comparatively yeah. Maybe it’s time for a change of pace is all.” Shion mutters playfully, hollowing out his cheeks.</p><p>“I think I can help you with that.” Nezumi grins, all teeth.</p><p>“What were you thinking?” Shion’s interest is piqued now. “Not another heist though. I’m too old and bureaucratic for that now.”</p><p>He’s missed the sound of Nezumi’s laughter, liberating, a rarity.</p><p>“Do you still read?”</p><p>Shion nods.</p><p>“Not as much as I’d like. Why?”</p><p>And then Nezumi fishes out a stack of papers from the inside of his jacket, and Shion notices his own handwriting on them, albeit crumpled.</p><p>“That isn’t the kind of reading I thought you meant.” Shion frowns.</p><p>He knows what he wrote, and he’s not quite sure he wants to hear it read out loud.</p><p>“No, I was thinking more like this.”</p><p>Then he shakes out his bag, and it is a heck of a lot more papers than what he took out just before.</p><p>“These are the things I wrote you but never sent.”</p><p> </p><p>Damn Nezumi, always with a flair for being dramatic as fuck.</p><p>It’s almost as beautiful as his singing. Almost.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The next few weeks are dull in the most brilliant way.</p><p>Shion shows off his new cooking skills while Nezumi devours his creations, repeating the same sassy compliments over and over again. One day, they wake up half past noon after a long night of trading stories, a competition of who has the craziest tale to tell. Nezumi laughs at him for thinking he even had a chance after being stuck in the same city for years and Shion groans at him, moaning that bureaucracy was its own unique brand of crazy and Nezumi wholeheartedly agrees, an ever-perceivable mischievous tint in his ashen eyes. They take a walking tour of the city, and for the first time, Shion thinks Nezumi might not hate being here, taking it all in silently in stride. Shion attempts to fish for a compliment on the new district he helped design and gets a snort and a punch on the shoulder first before he gets a soft <em>it’s quite nice </em>in return. It’s a little reminiscent of their past selves, a fond memory.</p><p>They fight over which movie to watch. Shion wins only to fall asleep on Nezumi’s shoulder and counts it as a victory that he doesn’t get shoved off. There are still the many dimensions to Nezumi that Shion remembers feeling troubled over, which side he’ll reveal, whether it be doting or assholery, vulnerable to the touch. Shion convinces Nezumi to let him redeem himself the next night but gets shot down. Whether or not it’s on purpose or not, Nezumi’s the one who falls asleep on Shion this time, somehow wiggling his head into Shion’s lap. It might be the most intimate thing they’ve done to date, and Shion doesn’t quite know what to do with himself. All he knows is that he certainly isn’t paying attention to whatever movie was playing anymore.</p><p>Because Nezumi looks so peaceful, breathing quietly in and out in Shion’s lap. His eyelashes are noticeably longer now that his eyelids are closed, Shion muses. He’s never noticed just how delicate his features were before, even when not accentuated by makeup for the stage. He’s always known Nezumi was beautiful, but there were only ever a couple of occasions where he was able to really look at him up so close without getting pushback, a scoff or a teasing remark. Carefully, gently, Shion runs his fingers through the top layer of Nezumi’s hair. Nezumi stirs against his touch but doesn’t wake up, his head shifting positions instead and fuck, of course, that’s the moment his body decides to betray him and get hard.</p><p>Shion, in shock and blushing, tries to weasel his way out of it, lifting Nezumi’s head up in a wild panic and makes his escape as discreetly as he could.</p><p>He tries to skip movie night after that, and settles for other things: wrestling matches (which don’t go any better), reading side by side (which somehow arouses similar images, how come books are always so focused on sex?), and even a few dances (that should really speak for itself).</p><p>Shion finds himself endlessly wanting. He’s always wanted, but now that Nezumi’s here, he can allow himself to want more, before they deal with the future, a huge question mark that neither has bothered to bring up. He knows Nezumi feels similarly despite not saying it, because he says it in his own way, sly looks and lingering touches, an underlying coat of wishful thinking in everything he does, as if he too is frightened by the horizon.</p><p> </p><p>That must be why neither of them say I love you.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Shion is the one who propositions sex first.</p><p>It’s only fitting, given he initiated their first kiss. Shion thinks they should probably do that whole defining the relationship thing, sure, but he gets the sense that somehow this way might make it easier, to show and not tell. They were never really the type to play by any sort of conventional rules anyway.</p><p>Nezumi appears caught off-guard for a fraction of a moment before he reverts to his normal, collected self, brushing it off with a teasing smile.</p><p>“You sure? I remember when you were all shy and flustered - ” Nezumi taunts, that smirk on his face charming, irritating, everything Shion’s missed and woefully failed to recreate in his mind up until Nezumi’s return.</p><p>“<em>Yes, I’m sure.</em>” Shion cuts him off firmly.</p><p>Nezumi raises an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“So impatient, did you experiment around and realize what your little virgin heart has been missing out on?”</p><p>It reminds Shion of their initial conversations back when they were teenagers, how Nezumi had made fun of his inexperience, his body, the awkward position Safu put him in with her question. Back then, Shion had no graceful reply in him, only weak retorts and discomfort crawling underneath his skin. Nezumi had wrung so much pleasure from Shion’s stutters, the knowledge that he held the upper hand.</p><p>But Shion is older now, knows Nezumi much better than just from one night’s worth of encounters. He sees right through those digs for what they are, strands of hope and insecurity falling off the ropes.</p><p>So Shion musters up all the sincerity he can into his next few words, owns up to it.</p><p>“No matter how much I experiment by myself, it won’t make me any less of a virgin.”</p><p>Heat immediately blooms across his cheeks because fuck, no matter how much he’s been okay with that fact until now, saying it aloud is a different thing. Hearing it raises that up a couple of notches, and then to see Nezumi’s face –</p><p>Oh, that surprisingly makes the payoff worth it, how Nezumi’s mask slips at the insinuation, how his cheeks hollow out in what feels like relief.</p><p>“You’ve been what, waiting for me?” Nezumi breathes out, eyebrows wiggling suggestively. He tilts his face in closer to gaze into Shion’s eyes, knees right in between Shion’s legs and the bed dips there noticeably under the weight. There is but a sliver of distance between them, the heat of Nezumi’s breath so close that Shion wants to just grab him and kiss him senseless.</p><p>How is it that they have yet to kiss since Nezumi’s return six weeks ago?</p><p>Shion gulps and resets himself.</p><p>“So, what if I was?”</p><p>Nezumi’s expression shifts, playfulness unhinged in the corner of his smile.</p><p>“Then I’d better make this good for you.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Virginity is a stupid social construct. Shion realizes how it sounds when he says he’s been waiting for Nezumi, but he didn’t mean it like that. Sex is a normal, healthy interest, and sure Shion is curious to know how it feels with someone that wasn’t his right hand. But it’s never risen to a point where he wanted it badly enough to seek it out with a stranger. It’s not as if he’s had much time to meet people while Nezumi’s been gone, but Shion’s sure that even if he has, there wouldn’t be much room left in him for them that wasn’t already taken up by Nezumi.</p><p>See, Nezumi’s touches have always awoken something in Shion. It’s always felt intimate, even when it was a rough grip to bruise, a harsh grab to halt him in his path, it was still Nezumi choosing to hold onto him. The soft press of Nezumi’s palm against his back, fingers intertwined in his, leading him along in clumsy steps in a small, cramped room. Back then, Shion had felt the words Nezumi chose not to say, concealed in the scars etched in his skin as they swayed from side to side.</p><p>Here, Nezumi takes the lead too, just like the dance. Here, Nezumi is snarky yet gentle, and as much as he boasts his experience over Shion, it really doesn’t seem like Nezumi’s all that practiced in it either.</p><p>Which is oddly comforting, because they were only teenagers fighting a war back then, and after their separation, Shion would like to think that Nezumi waited for him too.</p><p>So Shion doesn’t mind their bumps and fumbles in broad daylight, the rip of his shirt when Nezumi’s just a bit too feisty in getting it off him. He laughs when Nezumi pales before him, stops just an inch short of kissing him, nose scrunched at the inherent awkwardness of it. Their first two kisses all signified big moments, but they weren’t <em>planned. </em>Of course, this is what it would take to Nezumi lose his edge. Shion throws caution to the wind though and throws his arms around the other boy’s neck instead to link them together, pulling him down.</p><p>Well, he’s more of a man, now isn’t he? They both are.</p><p>“Scared of a little romance?” Shion teases, slightly breathless. There’s only been a handful of times where they’ve been in this position, when Shion could see Nezumi up close, gray hazy eyes, lips slightly parted. It drives Shion mad, the sizzling tension between them, how much he wants Nezumi. He wants to caress Nezumi’s hair, cup his jaw, kiss him senseless, pant into his mouth and hear him in return. He wants to show Nezumi that perhaps he can outsmart Shion with his ripostes and harsh sentences but there are some things that defy and surpass language.</p><p>He teased him sure, so why is Nezumi hesitating?</p><p>Nezumi’s gaze softens, a flash of sand-covered silver, and he leans down.</p><p>Their foreheads hit against one another, eliciting a soft gasp out of Shion, because that kind of hurt!</p><p>“Not scared, just bored of it. I didn’t come back bearing flowers or handwritten confessions or any of that crap.” Nezumi mutters. Yet his expression remains very much affectionate, as if enthralled by the sight beneath him, <em>by Shion.</em></p><p>“I liked your letters.” He pouts.</p><p>Nezumi snorts, hovering above him.</p><p>“Did you now?”</p><p>Shion glowers.</p><p>“Yes, now stop stalling and kiss me already.”</p><p>The look on Nezumi’s face is priceless, eyes wide and mouth agape.</p><p>Shion doesn’t know whether it’s him or Nezumi that moves first, but their mouths meet somewhere in the middle and unlike the previous two times, it isn’t smooth-going. Their teeth clatter and their lips don’t match up right away, contorted angles and nose bumping up against nose. It’s clumsy and desperate but their third kiss is the charm because there’s going to be a fourth, a fifth, a tenth, and it doesn’t have to be perfect because they have so many more nexts now, more tomorrows to be.</p><p>They break apart, eyes laser locked onto the other’s, both their chests flush together, skin against skin. Shion syncs his breathing to the pace of Nezumi’s heart pounding up against his ribcage, as desperate as Shion is for what’s to come.</p><p>Neither of them say a word before they dive in again and lose themselves in a sea of kisses, bites along lower lips and the sweep of tongue along teeth. Nezumi easily pries his mouth open, because Shion is more than happy to yield to Nezumi’s desire on full display, the urgency of it. He almost forgets to breathe when Nezumi suckles on his lower lip hard, clutches Shion’s back with dull nails right against his spine. It’s as if Nezumi’s setting his body ablaze and Shion is all too happy to let it burn, so he holds onto Nezumi, drags his fingers down those firm shoulder blades, down his scars. Shion lets out a muffled moan into Nezumi’s mouth at his insistent kisses and receives one back, the sound hypnotizing enough to drown in. Nezumi’s grabbing at him just as desperately, fingers carding through his hair, pulling at it just hard enough that Shion feels it.</p><p>“Nezumi.” Shion pants up at him.</p><p>He can feel sweat pooling at his temple, his face a heated inferno. He’s already so horribly into this that he can’t possibly imagine how it would feel when Nezumi touches more of him, takes him for his own.</p><p>“Hmm?” Nezumi hums back, amused.</p><p>“I want you.” Shion raises his hips up shamelessly, rubs their clothed erections together and there goes that smirk again, slipping at the electrifying contact.</p><p>“Good. Thought you were backing out on me there.” He teases, and Shion lets him have that one, if that means it will get them out of their clothes <em>faster.</em></p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>It takes longer than he expects, despite Shion insisting he’s not delicate. Frankly, he’s too turned on to want to wait for an appropriate amount of time to be stretched out. Nezumi ignores his protests, muttering the opposite of sweet nothings as he scissors Shion slowly, cold liquid dripping down his knuckles, the cleft of Shion’s ass.</p><p>Shion later admits his appreciation for said patience, the thin wire of Nezumi’s self-control on the verge of snapping when he pushes halfway into Shion, a burn that Shion has never experienced quite that way before.</p><p>“Still wished I went faster now?” Nezumi hisses out, his voice hoarse.</p><p>Shion shuts his eyes, tries to breathe through the pain, the sensation of fullness of Nezumi’s dick in him, squeezing down involuntarily. It sends a shudder all throughout his body, nerve to nerve, a circuit lit on sparks.</p><p>“Nezumi – ” Shion gasps.</p><p>“Shion, just, <em>tell me</em>.”</p><p>Nezumi’s eyes are shaky in a way that Shion’s never seen before without tears, his lip trembling, every breath coming out shallower than usual. Shion notices how Nezumi’s entire body is tense, his biceps bulging in support of his body weight. He’s holding himself still, holding himself back.</p><p>Shion squeezes his eyes shut and tries to will himself to relax, to sink into the foreign sensation and settle into the space where he and Nezumi meets. It helps only a little, but fuck it, he learns better as he goes anyway.</p><p>“Nezumi, <em>move.</em>”</p><p>It is obvious that Nezumi doesn’t believe him, but for once, his smart mouth doesn’t go off to call him out on it. Instead, he pulls back and then dips back in, starting off with slow, shallow thrusts. He finds the rhythm easier to handle, and little by little, Shion wiggles himself to push up against Nezumi, meeting him, urging him. It draws out a sharp groan from the other man, and he grips harder on Shion’s hipbone.</p><p>“You can go deeper.” Shion goads, licking his lip, eyelashes fluttering.</p><p>Nezumi’s thumb presses down even harder on Shion’s hip like it’s his lifeline and then his hips are moving, until Shion feels so full, so hot inside that his mind fizzles to white noise.</p><p>“Like that?” Nezumi growls, daring.</p><p>“Y-yeah, now <em>move</em>.” Shion manages to choke out, wrapping his legs around Nezumi’s sweat-slicked back.</p><p>Shion clearly didn’t get just how much Nezumi’s been holding back until Nezumi hits his prostate dead on, and his mouth lets out a dirty mess of a moan that he didn’t even think he was capable of producing. Nezumi pauses for a moment, reaches down to grip Shion’s dick with a few rough strokes, and Shion lets himself sink into the toe-curling pleasure of it.</p><p>“Nezumi – god.”</p><p>Nezumi grins, sharp teeth and fucking gorgeous as his hips snap up hard against that spot again. Shion could only whine, tossing his head back as his mind goes blank.</p><p>“No gods here Shion, just me.” Nezumi murmurs back. He releases the grip on Shion’s cock and moves to grasp Shion’s other hand instead on the bed, guiding it.</p><p>“Touch yourself for me.”</p><p>Nezumi’s voice is so low, seductive, commanding. Shion’s mind is debatably a bit hazy but this may be the sexiest Nezumi he’s ever had the pleasure of seeing, which is saying something.</p><p>Thus, Shion obeys, wrapping his fingers around the base of his dick. The up and down motions are familiar to him, but god, he didn’t realize how close he was, precum pooling at the tip, his dick hot and pulsing in his hand.</p><p>And then Nezumi pick up the pace too, momentarily taking Shion out of it. His hand falls slack to the side, losing himself in the star-blinding sensations of Nezumi just as hot moving in him.</p><p>“Shion, don’t – don’t stop.” Nezumi commands, a slight stutter in his words.</p><p>Shion nods and babbles something, probably nonsense, and it only takes a couple more strokes in sync with Nezumi fucking deep into him before he comes unexpectedly with a groan, splattering all over his hand and his chest.</p><p>“That’s it.” Nezumi pants, looking pleased with himself.</p><p>“Y-you too Nezumi.” Shion hears himself say back. “You, hngh, c-come for me too.”</p><p>He’s a bit too far to kiss Nezumi, cramping too much to move himself to a position where it would be easy to do. So, he opts to stare up at Nezumi instead, at the way his bangs are damp and a curtain just above his eyes, the warm flush on his cheeks, the outline of his naked body.</p><p>Instead of answering with words, Nezumi’s eyelids fall half-closed, and comes with soft groans and a quirky smile in the aftermath. When he detaches himself from Shion, even though Shion’s never felt this before, never felt so close to another human being, it feels like Nezumi’s taken a part of him along too.</p><p>“Miss me already?” Nezumi asks cheekily after tossing the condom away, coming back with a towel in hand.</p><p>“Yeah. It’s been years Nezumi. I’ll always miss you.” Shion answers earnestly, secretly rejoicing at the blush that materializes on his cheeks.</p><p>“So, was that good?”</p><p>Shion has nothing to compare to, but that did feel good, mind-blowing even at the end. Despite the mishaps and the bumps and the soreness he’s sure will settle in twice over tomorrow, Shion gets why sex is a big deal now. It’s an experience that can’t be replicated without going through it, the skin-tight feeling of Nezumi against him, in him, focusing all his attention on him and only him.</p><p>“Yeah, and next time will be even better.”   </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>There are couple of next times, and each time does get better. He learns through the motions, just by trying things out because Nezumi refuses to say exactly what he wants in bed of all things.</p><p>Surprisingly, he ends up doing so unwittingly, the first time they drink together.</p><p>He almost doubles over in laughter when Nezumi downs two shots worth of hard liquor without pause, only to have his face immediately turn red, sputtering.</p><p>“You people like this? What <em>is that?</em>” He yells, appalled after quite a coughing fit.</p><p>“It’s alcohol Nezumi. And you should’ve waited until I poured you something. You drank way too much too fast for your first time.” He chastises.</p><p>Nezumi grimaces.</p><p>“How was I supposed to know it tastes this pungent and this urgh, strong?”</p><p>“If you let me finish first, maybe you would’ve known better.” Shion chuckles.</p><p>Turns out, Nezumi’s people didn’t have much of a tolerance for alcohol. His cheeks glow rosy red in a matter of minutes and his eyes flip into hazy mist. He almost stumbles over himself before Shion catches him and they both tumble to the ground.</p><p>“Watch it, I can’t always be there to catch you.”</p><p>Nezumi shakes his head.</p><p>“You can. You will.”</p><p>Huh.</p><p>“So now you’re saying I <em>can </em>handle you after all.” Shion huffs.</p><p>“Well I practically let you do whatever you want to me, so if you couldn’t, wouldn’t that just be a travesty.”</p><p>Still snarky even when wasted. Noted.</p><p>“But what do you want me to do to you, specifically?” Shion presses on, curious.</p><p>Nezumi seems to ponder over it for a moment, and while the answer remains vague, Shion thinks he gets the idea.</p><p>“Make me work for it.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It doesn’t seem like Nezumi remembers imparting that little tidbit of information though, the next time he gets Nezumi naked on the bed and starts blowing him. He pulls off three times before Nezumi finally voices his discontent, groaning at the loss of contact when Shion blinks up at him with an innocent looking smile.</p><p>“What the <em>fuck </em>are you doing Shion?”</p><p>Shion tries to not fold, keeping his face as even as possible.</p><p>“You said once that I should make you work for it.” He says slowly, licking his lips suggestively.</p><p>“If I did, which I don’t remember, it probably wasn’t in the context of orgasms.” Nezumi deadpans, still breathing heavily.</p><p>Shion makes a small tsk sound at him, grinning from ear to ear.</p><p>“Oh, <em>au contraire, </em>I think that’s exactly what you meant.”</p><p>And boy, does he make Nezumi work for it, beg for it in fact, and it might be the most satisfying thing Shion’s ever done, rebuilding No. 6 included.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Shion never quite gets around to asking Nezumi how long he plans to stay. Somehow, he just settles in, eases in and makes the place his, <em>theirs. </em>Nezumi learns to tolerate alcohol a smidge better than he used to, and it is only fitting that their first <em>I love you </em>slips out half slurred with a gentle glow in his eyes. Shion murmurs it back later like a secret, in passing after dinner one night, and Nezumi’s stare flashes with surprise, hope leaking from the edges, free flowing.</p><p>“Me too.” Nezumi says back, a flush dusting his cheeks. He says the actual words two weeks later for the second time (first he probably thinks), and without being prompted first a month after that.</p><p>Then, the next thing to figure out is where they go from there.</p><p>“You want to leave?” Nezumi asks, frowning.</p><p>“Is that really so surprising?” Shion questions in return.</p><p>“Yeah, you grew up here, your life basically revolved around this godforsaken place from beginning to end. Well, not end.” Nezumi corrects himself. “Why now?”</p><p>“Finally found the courage to bring it up. I didn’t want you to be unhappy here.”</p><p>Nezumi stares blankly at him.</p><p>“Do you really think I’d be the type of person to keep that kind of thing bottled up and not bitch about it?” He asks blankly.</p><p>Shion doesn’t miss a beat.</p><p>“Yeah, I do Nezumi.” Shion says resolutely.</p><p>“And what if I say that I’m happy here?” Nezumi shoots back, forceful.</p><p>“What if I say I’m not?”</p><p>That retort gets Nezumi to falter for a moment, lips twitching in displeasure.</p><p>“Is that what this is about?” He finally asks, tone gentler this time.</p><p>“I’m not unhappy, but I think we could be happier.” Shion says softly.</p><p>Framing it this way is better, and Nezumi seems more receptive to it too, looking as if he’s pondering it seriously.</p><p>“Proposing a new adventure huh?” Nezumi finally cracks a smirk. “You sure you’re up for it?”</p><p>Shion beams at Nezumi, pure and radiant.</p><p>“Yeah, it’s about time.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It’s not a forever journey, but neither of them knows how long they’ll be gone for, just that there is a place waiting for them when they return. It isn’t like they’re forced to wander, the way Nezumi lived when he was off alone, scraping by. It also isn’t as if they had a destination, or a goal in mind. Shion thinks it suits them, because the most mundane of things were given new life when Nezumi was there, for better or for worse.</p><p>They go to a theater, try new cuisines, go stargazing after setting up camp outside on a clear summer night. They bicker over their next destination and end up blindly pointing to a spot on a map instead. It gets them pretty far for a few months.</p><p>Shion doesn’t remember having so much fun for a long time.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>They get shut out one day in a roaring thunderstorm in a small motel, the sky screaming thunder, gloom, and doom.</p><p>“It’s almost as bad as the day we met.” Shion comments, glancing at the rain-stained windows.</p><p>“And I still found my way to you. So, let’s go out. Clearly it’s safe.” Nezumi says sardonically.</p><p>“Hmm, more like a stay-in day today, I think. I’d like to try something.” Shion proposes. Nezumi tilts his head, interest piqued.</p><p>“What do you have in mind?”</p><p>Shion exhales, twice, and then:</p><p>“I want to try topping.”</p><p>He’s not quite sure what he expects from Nezumi, maybe a sarcastic comment, some kind of rebuke.</p><p>But all he gets back is a shaky <em>why.</em></p><p>“It’s been almost two years. I like everything we do together, this especially, but I’m curious how it feels to be on the other side.” Shion answers truthfully. Truth be told, he doesn’t need it, doesn’t need to uproot what they have already if Nezumi isn’t comfortable with it. However, he’d feel remiss if he didn’t at least bring it up. There’s a great deal of things that came out of him not being afraid to ask questions, both good and bad. The unknown is always scary, but with Nezumi, Shion doesn’t ever feel afraid of the outcome.</p><p>Nezumi bites his lip, the onyx in his eyes murky as he contemplates. Just when Shion’s about to say he doesn’t have to, not today, not ever, Nezumi gives Shion his answer.</p><p>“Okay Shion.”</p><p>No joke, no callback, just straight forward trust.</p><p>Shion gulps and nods, heart pounding.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It almost feels like the first time, pent-up energy and nerves flying everywhere. They’ve tried plenty of new things since, but none of them had quite the same effect on Shion, kinetic energy crackling in the air around them, anticipation and longing all rolled up into one.</p><p>“Remember your first time?” Nezumi teases.</p><p>Shion nods to himself. How could he forget?</p><p>“Yeah, so now that you have all that experience, you have to make this for me even better than that. You think you’re up to the challenge?”</p><p>“For you, I’d do anything.” Shion replies and kisses the shock on Nezumi’s face away.</p><p>That’s something he’ll never tire of, Nezumi exposing himself before Shion so easily, letting him run his fingers past his scars, press kisses to the marks there, leaving some of his own. How is he so lucky to feel Nezumi so intimately, get his voice to run hoarse, that smart mouth stunned speechless?</p><p>Nezumi traces the outline of the red snake around his abdomen, and then down to his erection, red and pulsating in Nezumi’s hand.</p><p>“Don’t keep me waiting now.” He winks and Shion could only pout in return.</p><p>“You made me take it slow my first time too Nezumi.” Shion mumbles back.</p><p>“So, two years later, this is all about <em>payback?</em>”</p><p>That elicits a giggle from Shion’s throat.</p><p>“Obviously.” Shion whispers.</p><p>Shion thought being on the receiving end of things would have prepared him so much better for this, but he’s still nervous whether or not he truly took enough time, used enough lube, enough fingers. He’s still pondering over the last part when Nezumi clamps down on him and rolls up on his forearms, practically growling at him.</p><p>“Are you going to fuck me yet, or am I going to have to do all the work myself there too?”</p><p>That shoots a wave of arousal straight to Shion’s dick, and well, if Nezumi insists.</p><p>The sensation of it, of Nezumi hot and tight wrapped around him, that is not something Shion could have ever prepared for. All of a sudden, the room feels so <em>hot </em>and with sweat dripping down his forehead, Shion has to remind himself to calm down. To breathe, to focus on Nezumi – his face, his body language.</p><p>“You can go all the way you know? I won’t break. After all that fingering, I’m kind of dying for something bigg-<em>er.</em>” Nezumi chokes at the end of his sentence, just as Shion gives in to his taunt and pushes in.</p><p>“Like that?” Shion bites out, panting.</p><p>“Y-yeah Shion.” Nezumi shuts his eyes, and Shion can feel him trying to focus on relaxing. “Just like that.”</p><p>Shion lets him get used to it, until Nezumi finally clenches around him and throws that familiar devious, loving smile at him again. It takes some very fine control for him to not pound into Nezumi the moment he pulls back, to not want to be enveloped wholly in that heat again right away. He does remember the first time, how it feels strangely worse before it feels better, and if he can find that spot for Nezumi, it’ll make things all the better, will probably get Nezumi to eat his words and then some.</p><p>Nezumi wraps one arm around and claws at one of Shion’s ass cheeks, the other around his own dick, rolling his eyes affectionately.</p><p>“Hurry up Shion. I can’t wait forever.”</p><p>Ever the sweet talker, Shion shakes his head at the other man and shifts his hips, the angle of his thrusts. It takes a couple of tries before he gets a handle of the rhythm, for Nezumi to get used to it too and meet him halfway, small groans escaping his mouth.</p><p>“Better?” Shion asks, speeding up.</p><p>Nezumi moans as a response, jerking himself off in shaky motions. It’s a good sign, but not the best sign. He has to best when Nezumi did this for him the first time right? That was the challenge?</p><p>Hence, Shion keeps switching it up, leaning forward to aggressively bite at Nezumi’s earlobe, bruising his lips, shifting the angle of his dick buried within Nezumi, a slow torrential build-up. When Nezumi gasps, a wretched drawn-out cry, Shion can’t help but smile wide, staying perfectly still so he could watch Nezumi’s expression.</p><p>He repeats it, the roll of hips exactly the same way, his heart lurching in awe when Nezumi’s face twists in pleasure, his words slurred and downright filthy. Shion does it again, and again, until Nezumi lets go of Shion altogether and his other hand falls limp, come smeared all over it. His hair is splayed across the bed, his ponytail in disarray and eyes half-shut.</p><p>“Thought you’d be screaming my name by now Nezumi.” Shion says. He tries to hold himself together, but in reality, he too is very close. But he wants to see if he can get Nezumi to crack, just a step further.</p><p>“<em>S-Shion.</em>” Nezumi stutters instead, finally opening his eyes, staring right into Shion’s.</p><p>“I’ll take t-that too.” Shion groans out, rocking himself into Nezumi harder, again, and again, and Nezumi gives in, body visibly shaking from the overstimulation, broken variations of the word Shion strewn in the air.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“So, was that better?” Shion asks breathlessly, his head hitting the pillow next to Nezumi. In the background, thunder roars and the wind howls, but Shion thinks the setting is perfect.</p><p>Nezumi flicks him in response, albeit so weak that it’s more adorable than irritating.</p><p>“No. It wasn’t.” Nezumi lies, but he rolls over and kisses Shion all the same.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>“Welcome home.” Nezumi smirks at him playfully as they open the door to their old suite.</p><p>“I’ve been home all this time, what are you saying Nezumi?” Shion teases back, dropping his bag at the door.</p><p>“Idiot. Don’t tell me that you haven’t missed your bed and prefer those squeaky ones provided by hotels instead.” He rolls his eyes, closing the door behind him.</p><p>Shion laughs.</p><p>“No, I have. Let’s go break it in again.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You can catch me on <a href="https://twitter.com/silverinerivers">twitter</a> &amp; read my other No. 6 fics <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverinerivers/works?fandom_id=479394">here!</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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